DAVID BENTLEY'S WEEKLY COLUMN

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WATCHAGONNADO?

Only an Excuse

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And That Was That!

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Shoo, Crow, Shoo!

What Did That Mean?

Childlike Freshness

On the Second Day of Christmas

Holiday Help

Show, Don't Tell

God's Glitter

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TYRANNICAL TANTRUMS

posted 03/20/2010
Although it was over 50 years ago, I remember Linda Kay Kelly snarling at me, "I don't like you; and I'm going to get my daddy to call the Army and tell them to drop a bomb on your house." I was devastated. After running home, I charged into the kitchen and related my playmate's threat to my mother while gasping for air. There was no telling how long it would be before a lone plane would appear overhead and drop a bomb directly onto our house. We had to evacuate immediately!

Mother tried to calm me, telling me that nobody was going to drop a bomb on our house just because Linda Kay was mad at me. I wanted to believe her, but I couldn't take any chances. I had to take action. I thought I knew what we needed to do, and there was no time to waste listening to my mother.

Eventually, Mother restrained me with a hug. She did her best to explain the facts of the situation to me, but I still wasn't convinced. She phoned my father at work, and he gave me the same explanation as Mother. Finally, I calmed down. After my parents and Linda Kay's parents talked, Linda Kay apologized. She had been wrong to scare me with her threat.

Now, all these years later, I see adults doing the same thing that Linda Kay did. They want their way; and, if they can't get it legitimately, they'll make up all sorts of stories to use as threats to scare or intimidate others. Then they try to get enough people to agree with them to win the fight, regardless of facts or rules. Unlike Linda Kay, most of them won't be forced to take responsibility or apologize unless they get caught doing something illegal.

What is this behavior teaching our children today? Probably not the same thing that Linda Kay Kelly and I learned from each other and our parents.

• Are you prone to ignore facts and rules to get your way?
  
  
• Do you substitute propaganda for truth?
  
  
• How often do you apologize and take responsibility when wrong?
  
  
• What are you teaching children about integrity?

David Bentley, M.Ed., is an avid observer of people, places and events. He uses his storytelling and questioning skills to help himself and others think outside the box in an ever-changing world. Comments about his column can be sent to davidbentley@sanjuanislander.com.

© 2010 David Bentley

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